ExquisitelySagacious Blog

Common Mistakes People Make on Social Media

Although Facebook asks WHAT’S ON YOUR MIND? There are some things that should not be posted. Here’s my list of the top mistakes people makes when posting on social media.

1. Bringing relationship problems to social media: majority are glad that you have them and the rest don’t care! Plus, a lot of the ones doing that are too damn old for shit like that.

2. Letting everybody know your every move: it’s best to work in silent and let your actions speak for you. There are a lot of dream killers waiting to destroy yours.

3. Asking everyone to pray for you: some people are praying against you, not with you. how many people honestly pray for a person when asked on social media? FYI: POSTING PRAYERS GOING UP IS NOT THE SAME THING AS SAYING AN ACTUAL PRAYER, IJS.

4. Reposting shit without researching first: I know we hate to read if it’s not necessary but posting these holidays all out of date, these fake disclaimers, then click like if you love Jesus: JUST STOP IT! JESUS HAS A MAIN LINE THAT ANYONE CAN REACH AND IT WAS ESTABLISH BEFORE SOCIAL MEDIA, SO IM NOT GOING TO HELL IF I DON’T SHARE A POST OR LIKE A LINK!

5. IF YOU GOING TO LIE ABOUT HOW YOU LIVING, WHAT YOU HAVE, WHO YOU GOT, HOW MUCH MONEY YOU MAKE ETC, PLEASE DELETE THE PEOPLE THAT REALLY KNOW YOU CAUSE WE HATE SEEING THEM LIES ON OUR PAGES, IJS!
EXTRAS: DON’T LET THIS BULLSHIT MCM, MCE, WCE, WCW, ETC. GET YOU INTO SOME SHIT YOU CAN’T GET OUT OF! People have a way of taking things meant for fun and turning it into drama! it’s so sad!

MEN IF YOU ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP, STOP LIKING AND COMMENTING ON THESE THOTS/OTHER WOMEN PAGES KNOWING YOU GOT A WOMAN, CUZ SOCIAL MEDIA GOING TO ALWAYS READ MORE INTO A POST! NOT TALKING ABOUT A SIMPLE LIKE HERE OR THERE. I’M TALKING ABOUT IF YOU CONSTANTING LIKING THE SAME PERSON PICTURE OVER AND OVER OR LEAVING DETAILED COMMENTS UNDER PICTURES THAT YOU DON’T EVEN LEAVE UNDER YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER PICTURES. ALSO, IF YOU KNOW YOU CAN’T HANDLE IF SHE TURNED THE TABLES ON YOU, PLEASE DON’T DO IT TO HER CAUSE AGAIN SOCIAL MEDIA, LOVES TO SEE YOU EMBARASS YOUR GF, WIFE, OR S.O. THAT’S WHEN THEY CAN WORM THEIR WAY IN.

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UN-Girl Code with Hazel-E

So by now I’m sure you heard of Hazel E putting her feet, in her big ass mouth! An altercation between Hazel E and comedian Jess Hilarious led to Hazel E being labeled a PEDOPHILE for her 19 year old GAY BOYFRIEND. Not one to deal with the truth being out there (Jess posted screenshots between Hazel’s man and his lover and the lover even corroborated her story with a video post stating its true!). Hazel E and her “boyfriend” fire back with homophobic posts condemning gays to death, threatening to damage careers, talking about Jess’s son (THE GIRL CODE SHOULD HAVE TOLD HER TO NEVER GET INTO IT WITH A COMEDIAN AND NEVER, EVER, EVER, BRING A WOMAN’S CHILD IN THE MIDST OF DRAMA), and if that wasn’t bad enough she started pulling the hater/colorism card talking about BLACK WOMEN HATE HER CAUSE SHE LIGHT SKINNED AND EVEN GOING SO FAR AS TO CALL BLACK WOMEN MONKEYS ( I guess she forgot that she is black too underneath all that bleaching/lightening cream and botched surgeries she used to achieve her look (which I’m sure NO ONE WANTS OR CARES TO HATE ON).

Girl when you living a lie, you have to fly under the radar! You can’t destroy someone’s life with a LIE, when yours can be destroyed with the TRUTH!

HAZEL E has really taken that LHHH crap to the extreme but in the real world, she aint about that life and now her need to live the reality show lifestyle and meet those ratchet expectations have written a check that her ass can’t cash! I hope they drop her from the show because how dare you degrade and bring down black women because your life is in shambles? Yet claim to be all for sisterhood and girl power in your book (that I havent read and don’t plan to) that was co-authored with a popular author. I’m curious as to what chapters, if any, she wrote!!!

Let’s use our imagination for a minute. If we were to go by her Colorism theory for a minute and believe in an alternate universe that people are hating on her because she’s light-skinned then that would still be an issue because then the light-skinned community would probably argue that she’s not cute enough to be in the category with them because of her excessive skin lightening and botched surgeries. Her light-skinned sense of entitlement would be revoke because it’s not natural.

Someone failed HAZEL E! Somewhere down down the line, she lost herself and nobody told her that SHE IS A BLACK WOMAN AND SHOULD CELEBRATE ALL SHADES OF BLACK WOMEN!

LIGHT-SKINNED OR NOT WHY WOULD YOU INSULT THE VERY PEOPLE YOU EXPECT TO SUPPORT YOUR BRAND AND BUY YOUR BOOK?

ASIDE FROM #45, FUCKBOYS, & TRIFLING BABY DADDIES, HAZEL E HAS JUST BEEN ADDED TO THE LIST OF THINGS THAT BLACK WOMEN DON’T LIKE

Everybody wanna Gucci Mane & Keyshia type relationship

Gucci Mane and Keyshia Ka’Oir are finally married and hip hop lovers around the world are going crazy for that type of hood love story. Waiting watching and hoping to imitate if possible a big moment in GuccI and Keyshia’s life, but that hood love didn’t happen overnight.

Keyshia was with him when he was at his lowest. She was there after all the sidelines, gold diggers, money hungry people in his life counted him out. He left her with all he had left and she didn’t spend a dime on herself. Instead she used it make him more money, so it was only right or natural for him to marry her. She had her own and could have left him when he went to jail but instead she didnt. She was doing wifey activities without the ring. How many of you would have done that?

Make no mistake, I’m truly happy for them. Black love is precious and should be celebrated all the time but to the people wishing for that type of love just know getting to that is never easy, especially if you are a celebrity or in the public eye. Nobody knows what they endured to get where they are. Nobody knows how many times Gucci fell down and she had to pick him back up because as we all know she was with him at his lowest meaning at one time or another, she was there with him at his highest as well. That was loyalty. She saw something in him and took the time to develop it into something more, something precious. That can be a tricky thing. What Keyshia did for Gucci won’t work for every man at his lowest. There are many fuckboys that will let you build him back up from his lowest and run back to the very people that broke him. There are many fuckboys that as soon as he is back on his feet will leave you high and dry for someone new and or white! So to all the men that think women should be like Keyshia YOU ARE WRONG! Every relationship is different and YOU HAVE TO TRULY KNOW WHAT YOU ARE WORKING WITH! Gucci Mane was ready to accept better, do better, be better. He was ready to do better. I mean we are talking about a man who pushed a woman out of a moving car! I’m glad that they were able to make their relationship work, but their relationship is not my relationship goals. Not because I’m already married but because I know that every relationship is different! Like the Pastors always say, “Don’t try to keep up with the Joneses! You don’t know what they had to go through or what they did to get what they got!”

Now we all know Keyshia had her own businesses before Gucci. She made her own money, so she didn’t need his money and that’s how she grew their business together in his absence. What would have happened if she didn’t have her own, spent his money(probably to help him and his legal woes), and still held him down in his absence by any means necessary? Would he have still proposed or would we be on Facebook calling her a fool? Regular women hold their men down while they are in jail everyday. Why are we so quick to condone those women but praise celebrity women like Keyshia? Think about that. Really think about that. I bet you everyone that is reading this knows someone that has or currently is holding it down for a guy in jail right now and I bet you more than that it is no one’s RELATIONSHIP GOALS!

ALL I’M SAYING IS LOVEIS LOVE & YES IT CAN MAKE YOU DO SOME CRAZY THINGS BUT YOU ALSO GOT TO KNOW WHAT TYPE OF PERSON YOU HAVE. KEYSHIA KNEW WHAT SHE HAD AND SHE INVESTED IN THAT PERSON. SHE SAW MORE IN HIM THAN HE PROBABLY SAW IN HIMSELF. SOME OF YALL ARE LOOKING FOR YALL BOAZ IN BO- BROKE ASS OR BO-TRIFLING AS OR BO-CHEATING AS AND THE LIST GOES ON. YOU CAN’T BUILD UP EVERY MAN YOU GET. LOVE IS NOT AN ART PROJECT. YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TO BUILD UP MAN AFTER MAN. YOU HAVE TO KNOW WHAT AND WHO YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE AND YOU CAN ONLY DO THAT BY ASKING THE LORD TO SHOW YOU THE PERSON YOU ARE AND THE PERSON YOU ARE WILLING TO HELP BUILD UP.

I’M HAPPY FOR GUCCI. HE REALLY GOT HIS LIFE IN ORDER AND THEY REALLY SEEM HAPPY! Congrats!

Friends or Nah?

friend

 

For the last few days, the topic of friendship has become a hot topic!  From the death of Chicago teen Kanneka Jenkins, which is rumored to have been caused by her so-called friends to the now famous Twitter beef between two best friends that turned really ugly, when one friend got a better job and expected her friend to be happy for her. I felt the need to address this topic.  As the mother of two girls and a boy, the issue of frenemies is sure to come up. In fact, it has already started to sprout. My oldest daughter is in the ninth grade just recently had to cut her best friend since sixth grade loose as well as dump her boyfriend.

Friends should look after one another, be there for each other, and support one another, but these days all too often friends are becoming secretly jealous of each other.  Log onto any social media site and you are sure to find ex-best friends beefing with each other. It’s so rampage that it makes you wonder, who, if anyone is raising these kids? I strive myself on being a great mother, but I also try to equip my kids with the skills needed to handle disputes and disagreements in a calm, respectable manner.

Since I don’t really know the basis of the Kanneka Jenkins Case, all I’m going to say about that situation is that the friends should have protected Kanneka way better than they did.  Although, my partying days are far behind me and I never really partied with more than 2 other people, we had a GIRL CODE! If we came together, we left together.  If you hooking up with someone, we got pictures, names, tag numbers, and info on where you were going to be. We called to make sure we all made it home safe.  If we had a bad feeling about someone, we followed our intuition and did whatever was necessary to leave the situation. Sometimes we went to the extreme and pretended to be gay or that our parents were crazy police officers (my dad was a police officer and didn’t even know it, lol) but it worked and I’m sure it may have prevented a lot of issues.  If we were drinking, we got our drinks directly from the bartender, if a guy was paying or we bought our own.  We never got sloppy drunk for fear of something bad happening. We didn’t even go to the bathroom alone.  Basically, we were joined at the hip!  The issue today is not many friends feel the need to do this anymore. They feel that it is not their job to protect their friend. That their friend is grown and can do whatever she wants.  WRONG! WE ARE OUR SISTER’S KEEPER AND WE HAVE TO START ACTING LIKE IT. IN A WORLD, WHERE WOMAN ARE KILLED FOR SIMPLY TELLING A MAN ‘NO, I DON’T WANT TO TALK TO YOU’ WHY WOULDN’T WE WANT TO PROTECT EACH OTHER?

Now, the situation with the best friends on Twitter.  Clearly, one of the friends had a very misguided idea of what true friendship is and should be.  First off, no one in this world owes you anything, but if you find someone that helps you along the way, you should be thankful. Friend 2 believes that Friend 1 should not be excelling in life without her. When Friend 1 gets a better job, Friend 2 is jealous of her an immediately tries to make the friend feel guilty for wanting more out of life. When Friend 1 confronts her about her behavior, Friend 2 gives this crazy speech that somehow, somewhere Friend 1 was supposed to wait on her so they can excel TOGETHER and it pretty much ends with Friend 2 saying some things that she clearly been holding in for a while.  She was Friend’s 1 best friend since they were little, yet she was jealous of friend 1 all along! With people like that, you can’t even get mad because Karma will eventually visit them and they will wish for friendship they once had.  Success will turn family and friends to enemies quicker than you know. WHEN GOD STARTS BLESSING YOU, YOU WILL SEE WHO IS REALLY FOR YOU!

LESSONS IN FRIENDSHIP THAT MY DAUGHTER LEARNED THIS PAST WEEK….My daughter and her BFF A* were best friends from 6th grade up until last week. They did everything together, their lil crushes (boyfriends) were even best friends. It was always the four of them. Well, BFF A* & my daughter’s crush were already close friends and eventually my daughter and BFF A* crush’s became close friends. My daughter never had an issue with her BFF and her crush being friends. She TRUSTED HER FRIEND! Even after her father and I talked to her about their friendship after BFF and my daughter’s crush and a few other people had a secret group where my daughter wasn’t apart of.  I told her to follow her heart, but keep her guard up. It’s high school and people change and people make new friends. We told her that she is going to have to learn how to ween out the people in her life that we couldn’t do it for her. She chose to remain friends with BFF A* Her and her crush eventually feel out but because they had the same friends they still were around each other. My daughter and BFF A* crush got closer and soon they were best friends.  Well BFF A* took that to mean that since my daughter and her crush were no longer speaking, she must have been after her crush, so she started pushing away from daughter until she completely stopped talking to her at all. My daughter tired talking to her to no avail, so my daughter stopped trying, but she didn’t stop hanging with or talking to the BFF A*’s crush or their friends in common. BFF A* eventually came around and was ready to talk about the situation. Well by then, my daughter gave her the cold shoulder and basically ignored her. Things got heated and I saw them getting out of hand when I did my nightly phone check. They both said things they shouldn’t have said, I woke my daughter up and made her apologize and I made her deactivate her IG for a while.   After a day or so, my daughter realized that she really did say some ugly things and that no matter how mad her friend made her, she shouldn’t have said the things she said, but she said something that stuck. “Momma, if she was my best friend, she should have known, I would never, ever do anything like that to her and I don’t need people like her in my life!”  She was right! I hate it took her losing a friend to learn about friendships, but sadly that’s the times we are living in. Friendships are no longer sisterhoods.

Fromthese three incidents come Life lessons to help me reach and teach my daughters!  EVERYBODY AIN’T YOUR FRIEND!

 

 

 

A Moment of Clarity

 

Image result for clarity

Yesterday, I had to attend my 11-year-old  great-nephew, JJ’s funeral. It was such a hard and emotional event. I have an 11-year-old daughter and the realization of just how fragile life is, weighted on me heavily. My family is far from perfect. In fact, lately, we’ve been going through a lot and I’ll admit we were slowly untangling.  It’s crazy how death tend to make you see how trivial some things are. My nephew’s death, although it is such a tragedy, taught me an important lesson: ENJOY THE LITTLE THINGS!

My nephew, JJ fought his battle with brain cancer for years and he never complained. He was strong! What should have broken him or his spirit made him stronger and he endured until God told him his journey was over. I long for the day that we live in a cancer-free world, but until that happens, all I can do is take the lessons my nephew left behind and use them in my life. I have no doubt that God had a plan for JJ. Although he was only here for a short time, his presence was felt and he will greatly be missed by all who ever met him. As an adult I find myself complaining about a headache or menstrual cramps, never realizing that I should be thankful that it’s just a headache or cramp instead of a tumor or cancer. God’s grace is upon us even when we don’t realize it. Small blessings are overlooked and unappreciated until something happens. We don’t appreciate our eyes until we are in the dark and cannot see. We don’t appreciate our legs until they lock up on us or our knees goes out. We don’t appreciate the ability to talk, hear, touch, drive, eat, sleep, etc. until we can no longer do those things.  When I say we, I mean me too. I’m guilty as well.

My youngest daughter, my 11-year-old is ADHD and we struggle a lot with it and some days are bad, very bad, but I could never imagine losing my baby. The funeral yesterday made me appreciative of all the moments good and bad with my daughter, because here was a mother wishing for another moment, good or bad with her son. A grandmother longing to hear her grandson’s voice once more.  A father wishing to right the wrongs he made.  As I looked around that church, I couldn’t help but thing of my children, my youngest in particular. I thought about how much I complain about her ADHD diagnosis and how much it affect our lives and how that is nothing, nothing, compared to dealing with a child being diagnosed with Cancer.  So that was my moment of clarity, my epiphany, I guess you would say.   We left on a family vacation right after the funeral and I was so exhausted, I just wanted to sleep, but my youngest was rived up, of course and I found myself yelling at her.  The rest of the afternoon was a struggle keeping her on task and things like that. And just like that my moment of clarity was out the window until I was awaken and everyone else was asleep and the need to blog fell heavily on my heart. I owe my daughter an apology. I want to wake her up now and apologize to her. I  realize that this is our first family vacation in a long time and she was really just excited.  I’m determined to be a better mother and to complain less. Life is too short to sweat the little things, to complain or get angry about every little thing.  JJ taught me that. Perhaps, I already knew that but through his life and his story, I’m reminded that sometimes, we all need to have that moment of clarity and I’m just so thankful I realize my moment. JJ is gone, but he will never be forgotten. I am working on a scholarship program that I plan to do yearly in his honor! I don’t want his death to be in vain and I want to find a way to bring awareness to childhood cancers. St. Jude played a big part in JJ’s lives and no amount of words will ever be enough to thank them, but for an organization that helps so many people, I can do my part and try to help them, help others.

As I listen to my children snore and toss in their sleep, I’m thankful. Thankful for another chance to get it right. I’m not perfect, but I’ll willing to do better and that’s all I can do!

 

A Mother’s Life…

These last few weeks have been crazy. They have been really hard and really tough. The last few weeks I have just felt so overwhelmed that it was hard to even get out of bed in the mornings.  Although I did, deep down inside I just wanted to lock myself in my room shut the blinds, turn the lights of, pull the cover over my head, and just stay there. ALONE. IN THE DARKNESS.

But I couldn’t do that.  For one, self-pity wasn’t going to do anything but make me more depressed and trigger panic or anxiety attacks and TWO, I had three people looking up to me to get up each and every day. . . MY CHILDREN.

What was going on in my life so bad that made me want to lay around? You probably want to know. The answer is simple…LIFE HAPPENED. THINGS HAPPENED. LIFE CHANGE. PEOPLE CHANGE. SHIT HAPPENS.

I’ve never been a quitter. Maybe it’s just in my nature or maybe it’s just that I hate to say that there’s something I cannot do or something I cannot fix. Yes, I know that’s a bad way to look at things because I can’t do everything, but what I’m saying is that it takes a whole lot to make me quit.  These last few weeks tested that theory and I was so close in to just giving up and letting the depression overcome me, but by the grace of God through caring friends and family, I managed to get back on track and get more focused.

My favorite book is The Invisible Man  by Ralph Ellison and if you’ve ever read that book and you know me well then you would know why it’s my favorite. No, it’s not a book about ghosts and spirits, but a book about identity and self-worth.  That’s how I’ve felt over the past few days, INVISIBLE! LIKE NOBODY SEES ME. NOBODY UNDERSTANDS ME. NOBODY CARES.

Ralph writes, ““I am an invisible man. No, I am not a spook like those who haunted Edgar Allen Poe; nor am I one of your Hollywood-movie extoplasms. I am a man of substance, of flesh and bone, fiber and liquids—and I might even be said to possess a mind. I am invisible, understand, simply because people refuse to see me. Like the bodiless heads you see sometimes in circus sideshows, it is as though I have been surrounded by mirrors of hard, distorting glass. When they approach me they see only my surroundings, themselves, or figments of their imagination—indeed, everything and anything except me.” –The Invisible Man (1952)

INVISIBLE ME!  But today, I feel renewed. I feel as my strength has been refilled and I can handle the tough times ahead. That’s life, though. You will have good days and there will be bad days. The thing is how you deal with it that matters.  As Mother’s Day approaches, I know that I cannot afford to give up because my children are watching me and no matter what is going wrong in my life, I know one thing that I am doing right….BEING A MOTHER!

Some people think motherhood is about buying expensive clothes and shoes, providing your child with the very best brands that money can buy or taking them on expensive trips and buying expensive gifts, but that’s not all motherhood is about. Motherhood can be summed up in one word……TIME! If you not spending time with your child then no amount of gifts is going to make up for that. If you not taking the time to raise your children and tell them right from wrong, instill morals and values in their lives then buying gifts still won’t help. Sometimes we get so caught up in the holiday honoring mothers that we forget A MOTHER’S JOB IS NEVER DONE. IT’S NEVER OVER. THERE ARE NO SICK DAYS, VACATION, OR HOLIDAYS. ONCE YOU BECOME A MOTHER THAT IS IN HER CHILD’S OR children’s LIVES THEN THAT BECOMES YOUR NUMBER ONE PRIORITY!

Today, I found myself slipping back into invisibility, but my youngest child came home with a handmade Mother’s Day Certificate Thanking me for being a #1 Mom. That lifted me up beyond words could explain. I thank God for trusting me enough to be their mother and I thank them for motivating me to be the best mother I can be. Of course, I can’t take all the credit because if it wasn’t for my mother’s love, grace, and sometimes her not sparing the rod then I know that I wouldn’t be the woman or mother I am today!

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY TO ALL THE MOTHERS AND THE ONES THAT TAKE ON THE ROLE AS MOTHERS!

In the Press…

high-quality-extra-virgin-olive-oil-for

 

I enjoy being a writer, and I’m fortunate that I can stay at home and write full-time thanks to my husband; however, the urge to rejoin the workforce has been weighing heavily on me for the last six months or so.  Two incomes are always better than one, but for the most part, we make do with the one income. My husband doesn’t pressure me to work, because he understands that having a job and career are two different things. When I went to college, I was sure I wanted to be a teacher. I wanted nothing more than to teach. Even writing was put on the backburner, because I felt like becoming a teacher was my calling. I was meant to be a teacher. After completing my internship in the public schools, my ideas about teaching changed drastically. Teaching wasn’t teaching anymore. Teaching had become so scripted that there was no room for creativity.  No Child Left Behind and Common Core did the opposite of what it was supposed to do….LEAVE CHILDREN BEHIND. I lost all interest in teaching after meeting teachers that were only concerned with students passing a test rather than actually learning and teaching.

In between graduating college and now, I worked outside the home, but it was only a job for me. My working days in Georgia were the worse.  I worked at the Post Office, a male-dominated field. The men really felt as if they were gods. If you didn’t bow down to them, submit to their demands, or sleep with them or you were treated less than poo. Being that my job was seasonal/temporary and Georgia being a right to work state, I kept silent about the craziness that went on at that post office. I honestly didn’t even think about the many ethics codes that were violated or the sexual harassment that I endured, because that’s exactly what it was. I was young and honestly, I was just excited to be working and actually doing something for me for a change. I did my job, and I went home. There were a few incidents where I had to constantly reject men or speak up for myself, because they would not leave me alone. That was that. I was informed after my seasonal employment ended that falsified documents had been added to my file.  When the job restarted, I got yet another male supervisor that either forced your submission or you felt his wrath. Back then, I wasn’t the one to feel anyone’s wrath, so naturally I would lash out. I remember being written up and called in to the manager’s office.  He informed me of the citations in my file and allowed me the opportunity to state my case. I would have been fired, but he eventually agreed that I had been falsely accused. At the end of the job assignment, I was laid off and not called back.  Girls that I worked with who had caved to the men in power were called back but not me. After that, I was either overqualified or under-qualified for jobs.

It was so bad that I couldn’t even get a job in fast-food, because no manager could understand why someone with a degree would want to work such a job. Again, it wasn’t about the money. It’s never been about the money. As I explained earlier, I’m very fortunate to have a husband that has always been blessed with a good job. Anyway, I tried going back to school, but the the tuition was killing me with only one income. I eventually had to stop. I managed to do one semester towards another degree before stopping.  In the midst of all this, I started writing again. I even published my first and second books. I still yearned to work outside of the home. My kids were bigger, and it there was no reason for me to be at home since all of my children were not school aged.  I started the job search again and managed to land a job as a lead teacher at a daycare, but that too only lasted a short while. My son had some issues at school that required me to  become a stay at home mom again. I hated to leave, but my son was and is way more important that a job. I’ve been unemployed ever since then, except for me starting my own publishing company, literary magazine, and began writing books.  I have done so many applications, follow-ups, interviews, etc and haven’t had ONE callback. Not even a temp agency could find me employment. Yet, I still didn’t give up. I continued the job search. Still nothing. I have no criminal record, and I’m educated. I guess the old saying is true…It’s not what you know but who you know! I went on an interview Friday, and I thought it went great. It was not my ideal place for a job, but it was a job and my goal is to just get back into the workforce even if it is starting small. The manager was telling me to expect a call on Monday and asking about my schedule, etc., and I was just sure I had a job. I may still receive a call but fast Forward to yesterday, still no phone call. As much as I hated to admit it, I was disappointed. I allowed myself to get my hopes up. When it fell through, I was hurt. I wanted to give up and just embrace being a stay at home mom. I mean I can’t make anyone hire me, and I can’t change my past or my work history. I do not regret any decision I made for my family.  Although, I wanted to give up, I didn’t. I made up my mind to do more applications and job search some more. Yesterday evening, I received a callback for a job, a high-paying job, to take the assessment for phase one of their hiring process.  Although, it’s not a job offer. It restored my hope and strengthened my faith that God sees me trying, and He has not forgotten about me! It may seem such a small thing, but for me it was huge. God stepped in when I was on the verge of letting go. HE stepped in when I felt hopeless, and ready to give up. I may not get the job. Who knows I probably will, but I know now that all of my trying is not in vain!

A friend of mine referred me to the process required to make olive oil.  An olive goes through three stages before it is transformed into what we know as olive oil.  Jekayln Carr has a song titled Greater.  It refers to the shaking, beating, and pressing process that takes place in order for the oil to run out of the olive.  I know that God is using this experience to produce in me greater faith, greater patience, and greater expectations.  So, this job search adventure can be summed up in three words: GREATER IS COMING!

1 Corinthians 2:9 King James Version (KJV)

But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.

 

 

HELPMATE DAYS 4-6

Psalms 128:3  Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house; thy children like olive plants around thy table

 

The symbolism of a vine is used throughout the Bible.  John 15:5 says I am the vine, ye are the branches; He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit, for without me ye can do nothing.

This is Jesus speaking to the disciples at the last supper. In this verse, I think Jesus is telling the disciples to stay godly, to let the word of God, his teaching, the holy spirit run through them as vines and branches and they will bear much fruit or reward.  Like Jesus was telling the disciples to be godly, so that they can get their rewards, in Psalms 128:3, God is charging wives to be as a vine on a house and be godly so that their children and household can also be godly.  As a wife is godly, her children will be at peace in Christ. Since the olive leaf or olive branch seems to always signify something positive, by the children being like olive plants, I think it is suggesting that the children will be positive and peaceful.

Psalms 121:5  The Lord is thy keeper; the Lord is thy shade upon they right hand.

This scripture was relatively easy. The Lord is thy keeper is just another one of God’s promise to be our everything.  HE will keep up despite it all; the good and the bad. He is our protector. He is our leader. He is our everything. He is the shade upon thy right hand.

In the second part of this scripture, the word shade stands out.  What is Shade?  Shade is something that give protection from the burning sun and using that symbolism with God, this scripture is telling us that God is our protector, which emphasizes the front part of the scripture.  God protects us as we go through the fires of sin.  His protection covers us, so that we are not burned or scorched as Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego were three Jewish men thrown into a fiery furnace by Nebuchadnezzar, king of Babylon, when they refused to bow down to the king’s image per chapter 3 of the book of Daniel. Though we walk through the fire, we will not be scorned.

‘Thy right hand’ also sticks out.  First off, RIGHT is a direction that often symbolizes trustworthiness and a position of power. Ephesians 1: 20 states that Jesus sits on the right hand of God.

It is said that if a person looks to the left when speaking, he/she is lying. By Jesus sitting on the right side of God, we see that God trusted him wholeheartedly to have power and dominion over all things, especially our enemies.

Luke 8 1-3 gives us an examples of Jesus’s ministry. It shows people like us, walking and talking with Jesus.  Simply being in his presence was a blessing.  This scripture to me symbolizes Jesus’s love for the people.  He didn’t surround himself  with priests and teachers, etc.  He walked and talked with regular people. People who dealt with life harshness and needed relief.

 

Preparing for Life’s Snow

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One look at this scripture and prepared comes to mind.  To me,this scripture is saying that a wise woman is also prepared. She is prepared to weather the stormy days that may arise in her household because she has took the time to make arrangements beforehand.  A wise woman is proactive instead of reactive. Instead of waiting for snow to fall in her life, she prepares for it now. Like the grasshopper and the ant, they both knew winter was coming, but only one decided to prepare for it.

A wise woman, a godly woman embodies her household in the Lord before trials and tribulations arises. Not only that she has to take care of the household, cooking, cleaning, raising children, basically turning a house into a home! She has a lot to deal with that she could never fully complete without God on her side and being prepared for storms.  Thank God for the snow, because as inconvenience as it may be, it will either make or break you. It will draw you closer to him or push you further back.

Indie Authors

 

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I’ve been in this writing game almost two years and it’s sad that many authors are still divided. In a huge field such as writing, you would think that indie authors would have a close-knit relationship with each other, but that is furthest from the truth. I saw so much shade being thrown because of the top 100 authors or because  an author is signed with a certain company or simply because an author is not signed as all.

I learned early on to keep my head down and focus on myself to avoid getting caught up in the nonsense of this industry.  Other than the division in the industry, another issue the fact that there are thousands of urban authors and there are only a few  awards shows geared to honor indie authors and publishers.

SO WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

That means that it is no way possible for everyone to get recognized.

As an indie author, signed author, and a indie publisher, to say it is a tough market to stand out in would be an understatement. However, that does not stop me from trying and focusing on my brand.  Sure I have my bad days. What authors have to realize that they have to stop seeking recognition from outsiders and focus on accepting and encouraging themselves.

AS LONG AS YOU PUT 100% INTO YOUR BOOKS THEN YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO BE HAPPY WITH THAT AND IGNORE THE CRAZINESS! DON’T WAIT FOR OTHERS TO TOOT YOUR HORN, DO IT FOR THEM!